I submitted the below letter to the Star-Ledger on Friday, Aug. 7.  Since the letter hasn’t seen the light of day, I thought I’d publish it here.

It’s self-explanatory.

I consistently encourage Latinos to send letters to the editor as well as opinion pieces.  We must have our voices heard!  Drop me a line if you want some advice on how to go about it: imendez@latinosnj.com.

So here’s my two cents as expressed in the below letter to the editor:

The Star-Ledger’s front page headline “First Hispanic Justice” over a photo of a beaming Sonia Sotomayor was a sight to behold.  Thursday’s confirmation vote was historical and Latinos throughout the country and New Jersey were bursting with emotions and pride.

But wait!  When I went to read the coverage, I was stunned to see that the state’s largest newspaper chose to use newswires.   You didn’t bother to assign a reporter to capture what Latinos in New Jersey were thinking and feeling on a day that will be emblazoned in our memories until our last breaths.  And you couldn’t even be bothered to include any comments from our own Senator Bob Menendez, one of only two Latino senators in the country, who proudly cast a vote on her behalf.

I know you have all the relevant statistics regarding the Latino population in New Jersey, including the large number of Puerto Ricans.  Indeed, your editorial that ran that same day (“A Supreme moment”) noted the nation’s combined “minority” population has reached 100 million but, alas, there was no mention of the more than 1.4 million Latinos in your own backyard.

The editorial succinctly notes that the Republicans who voted against Judge Sotomayor “seemed trapped in a disappearing past.”    Well, I believe the same can be said about the Star-Ledger in this case.  You missed the boat in a big way by ignoring what New Jersey Latinos were thinking and saying on what certainly was one of the greatest days in our country, in New Jersey, in our communities, and in our lifetime.

I know many of us had been planning to save a copy of the Aug. 7, 2009 edition of the Star-Ledger as a keepsake. But given the paper’s decision to ignore the voices of New Jersey Latinos who regard Judge Sotomayor as a family member, I wouldn’t be surprised if those copies land in the recycling bins.

There’s little difference between the PolitickerNJ 2009 So-Called Power List and the exclusive country clubs that dot the New Jersey landscape where people of color are more than likely found serving the members and scrubbing the bathrooms. In these worlds, Latinos are invisible to those engaged in conversations about earth-shaking issues like who made a So-Called Power List except when an extra round of drinks is needed (“Where is that damn Jose?!”).

So it was particularly delicious – and appropriate – that a head waiter by the name of Henry Mendez made this So-Called Power List. The irony almost made me laugh.

Here’s a news flash: You don’t have to go into the kitchens to find Latinos who are making a difference in New Jersey. So where are they?

Since I have no interest in taking part in that “Name that Powerful Latino/a” nonsense, here’s my quick take.

We are lawyers, business owners, heads of non-profits and constituency groups, educators and law enforcement professionals – and so many more. We are office-holders who believe change can come through public service (and who won’t sell their souls to the highest bidder). We are political strategists and communication consultants. We are women and men who are working to make changes in a political system where decision-makers pretend to be engaged in conversations with us while looking over our heads to see who else has entered the room.

I want to note that numerous names on the So-Called Power List are the same ones that get a lot of airtime. Alas, you won’t see Latinos on the local television or radio talk shows because it appears the hosts and producers are either unbelievably lazy, clueless or both, and prefer to dust off their Rolodexes and tap the same old tired faces that don’t reflect the colors and experiences of the more than 1.4 million Latinos in New Jersey.

Ditto for the news stories about issues (other than immigration) where reporters often can’t seem to find a Rodriguez or Rivera or a Perez to provide some comments.

(Folks, believe it or not, Latinos have opinions on issues beyond immigration. Yes that is a crucial issue, but we can also discuss politics, the economy and such. Imagine that!)

So regarding the PolitickerNJ Editor’s note about the “glaring absence of Latinos” from the So-Called Power List and its “hope” that “by bringing our view to light it engenders meaningful discussion”:

Trust me. Those discussions are already taking place among Latinos, and they have been for quite some time.

We welcome PolitickerNJ to our world. Or would it make it easier if I said welcome to our table and here are today’s specials?

I’ve been accused of being anti-American, because I use the First Amendment, but that makes me arrogant. I speak on unification, but many think I’m speaking separation. I speak historical facts of our nation, but this has turned into some ugly accusations. So, maybe I need to tell you about the person inside, the one behind the brown eyes. This way you will comprehend, that we are just of “Mice and Men.”

I wish I could explain the situation without having some crazy ramifications. The assassination of my tio sent my mom into frenzy and demanded I come to the United States where not just the weather is cold, but the blood es frio. From a civil war in El Salvador, to a gang war in Southern California, I didn’t know what was in store. My emotions are serious because what I encountered would make you delirious. I came from a place where we were all one people, and I landed where so many people are different and are fighting for rights that aren’t equal. I wasn’t Salvadorian anymore; I became Latino, infused in the culture Americano.

So, I defended myself from Mexican gangs at the age of seven and saw my first real gang brawl at the age of 11. I was hated by kids who looked like me and talked like me but weren’t me. My Salvadorian people were taking their jobs and their opportunities in Los Angeles, you see? So parents were screaming at what Salvadorians were stealing. Now, this had a great affect on their children. Gangs were created to make sure that Salvadorians were protected. So out of this, La Mara Salvatrucha trece was erected. Naturally I was confused and conflicted. So this was a choice I needed to make and to join anything I needed to be selective. So, in Junior High I began to get involved in basketball and sports. Unfortunately for baloncesto I was a bit short. Regardless I made the best of it, and the “Bloods” liked the way I passed the ball on the court so they saw me as an investment and protected it. I was friendly so that’s what they nicknamed me. I was no longer bothered by my Mexican brothers. And Blacks had respect for me because I was one of them even though I wasn’t their color.

So when I entered high school I had already changed my ways, because new mentors had taken time to show me that education could also get me paid. I was now the mediator, the one who could speak better than most educators. I was a point guard and leader, and yet I saw that we (Latinos and Blacks) were bottom feeders. We fight amongst ourselves because we want second place, yet we don’t know each other’s history and believe what we are told. What a disgrace.

So one evening after practice I was walking home, and the gangsters by this time stopped following me around. But didn’t stop them from testing me; after all, I was an investment not the king of Rome. So because I was walking with Black friends, the Mexicans didn’t appreciate that and tried to make this day their end. A fight ensued and I wasn’t touched because I was off limits to both crews. Now what do I do? I kept quiet ‘cause that’s the rule of the street. A week later, a friend from elementary school whom I fought with was lying dead from this brawl in heat. I knew the situation and I knew the specifics, the same day he got out of jail we all contributed to the statistics.

Finally I left California. I left the devil’s playpen to become educated in hell’s den. Lawrenceville, New Jersey where I met who now is my best friend; where I became educated in the tribulations of African-Americans. Where I learned my history wasn’t too far different then the Latino Caribbean. Where alcohol became my addiction and knowledge of self was feeding into my mission. Then, through learning Latin American history, I learned about the U.S. contradiction of how success was measured in Latin American misery. Specifically in my country, so much involvement of the U.S. that I found it touched my family.

August 20, 1980. I barely remember the day but learning who sent to kill him enraged me. A union leader working for the salaries and working conditions of his people, gunned down with two M-16s of American artillery. God, Tio, I miss you. I didn’t know who you truly were when you were alive, but I do know now, that I live because you died. Anywhere from a million to $8 million a day, the United States sent to El Salvador to fight a war that wasn’t communist-related, and if anyone wants to see proof, just go out and rent “Voces Inocentes”.

And here I am giving a damn, when the rest of the world is out there working out scams. Latinos get mad at me cause I’m impartial. I dish it out to anyone who I feel isn’t helping our community out, so I must be psycho. I’m just trying to let everyone understand that here we are Latinos, when once I was Mayan and you were Taino. Then we have those that attack my passion for equality and justice. I’m sorry if I offend and give the wrong impression. I mean well, but I’m feeling like I might end up in a hospital. A refugee in a country that forced me to leave home to receive refuge in a melting pot of madness; this is just a blog I dare anyone to come close and touch this. This is as real as it gets from murders in the ghetto to the bullet-riddled bus that speaks to me when any politician says hello. This is an insight of passion and anger, but I’m not mad at the U.S. I’m mad at us for fighting amongst us, for believing the lies that separate us. If all my tears hadn’t already been shed, I would shed some tears because our children are already dead.

On Tuesday, August 12, I testified before the New Jersey STARS Task Force Hearing, at the New Jersey Institute of Technology (NJIT) in Newark, NJ. The task force was created last month by Governor Jon Corzine to address the challenges in funding NJ STARS for the future. I gave testimony from a corporate standpoint as well as my role as Trustee at Bergen Community College. I also serve as a Trustee Ambassador for the New Jersey Council of County Colleges, which has a voice on the NJ STARS Task Force.

Under the NJ STARS program (which stands for Student Tuition Assistance Reward Scholarship), a student who graduates in the top 20% of their class is guaranteed free tuition to a community college. As long as the NJ STARS student maintains at least 3.0 GPA, they can continue receiving these scholarship funds.The scholarship is awarded only after all other federal and state financial aid opportunities are exhausted.

The challenge facing the state is the program’s growing popularity and how to fund it. During the budget negotiations between Gov. Corzine and the state legislature, an agreement was made to return the $2.5 million slated to be cut from the program so as to keep it whole for the 2008-2009 school year, and to create a task force to discuss how to address the budget challenges for NJ STARS. Hence, the creation of the NJ STARS Task Force.

I did not give prepared remarks since I am one who likes to speak from the heart and speak passionately. Here is a summary of my remarks to the task force.

NJ STARS is a program that needs to be funded by the State of New Jersey. NJ STARS is an INVESTMENT, not an EXPENSE. This is a very important distinction because the state spends our tax dollars on many different areas as part of its ongoing operations. However, expenditures that go directly towards the education of our students are an INVESTMENT because the state will see a return to the long-term benefit of the state. The fact of the matter is that students who graduate New Jersey colleges under the NJ STARS (and/or NJ STARS II) program are highly likely to stay and seek employment in the state, thus contributing to the state’s tax revenues and other economic growth opportunities.

I urged the panel that if they have their backs to the wall, that any changes be very gradual and over a couple of years. The reason for this is to allow a transition for high schools to adjust their counseling of their students to be in compliance with NJ STARS. For example, one concern is that at least 30% of NJ STARS recipients take at least one remedial course when they get to community colleges because of an academic deficiency. This is an issue that needs to be addressed in conjunction with our high schools. If the states works to improve its collaboration with high schools (through its guidance counselors and teachers), the issue of remedial courses would be resolved at the high school level before the students enrolls in community college, thus saving the state a significant amount of money from the NJ STARS program. This could be done during the senior year before graduation or during summer school after graduation but before enrollment in a community college.

I also testified that the task force needs to be careful not to assume that past percentage increases in required funding for NJ STARS is a linear percentage increase for the foreseeable future. NJ STARS is awarded after all federal and state financial aid is exhausted. It’s a well-known fact that Congress for the last 12 years had not increased Pell Grants and other financial aid programs despite the increases in college tuition.

However, last month, Congress passed H.R. 4137: The Higher Education Reauthorization and College Opportunity Act of 2008. This bill increases the authorization maximum for Pell Grants, creates year-round Pell Grants (including summer courses), opens up Pell Grants to students with disabilities, and creates programs focused on helping community colleges students in need of remedial coursework. President Bush is widely expected to sign the bill into law. This congressional bill may help reduce the burden of increased funding for NJ STARS by the state since this program is only funded AFTER all other federal and state financial aid has been exhausted.

Lastly, I urged the task force not to tinker with the spirit of the NJ STARS program. The mission of the program is to provide higher education access to achieving students regardless of income limits if they perform well in high school (i.e. top 20% of graduating class). Community colleges provide a more economical alternative to 4-year colleges and the state can leverage that value investment to provide taxpayers with the best return on their education investment. I also highlighted research that shows that community college students who transfer to 4-year colleges actually perform better at the 4-year college than students who started at the 4-year colleges from the beginning; this is when comparing the last two years before graduation. Given that tuition at community colleges is more economical compared to 4-year colleges, I urged the task force to keep NJ STARS focused on the community college.

Besides, the task force still needs to address the challenge of funding NJ STARS II, which is the program that allows NJ STARS students to transfer to a 4-year state university in the state if they finish community college with a 3.0 GPA or better. NJ STARS II is another outstanding program and that too needs to be funded.

Of all of my comments to the task force, I emphasized more than anything else that NJ STARS is an INVESTMENT, not an EXPENSE. When we as a community talk to our state legislators, that is the message that needs to be conveyed. The state legislature is expected to vote on potential amendments to NJ STARS this fall.

To be continued — until the task force comes back with its recommendation to Gov. Corzine.

As residents of the United States of America, we are fortunate to live in a country where the government is controlled by the people it serves. It is clear when reading the words of our nation’s great Constitution that the architects of this transcendent document meant for “the people” to have the final say in how the nation moves forward. The people’s will is expressed through the representatives they elect to speak on their behalf.

This type of political structure is called representative government. Each Election Day the people have an opportunity to choose a person that will best reflect their will and that of their neighbors. That being said, the questions one must continually ask are: Is this representative making decisions with my best interests in mind? And, is the representation currently in place reflective of the community it serves?

It is critical one realizes the magnitude of these questions. The first is important because it encourages one to question whether the person who was chosen to represent in the past still holds the values and judgment he/she was elected to exercise. This becomes increasingly important when one considers the competing interests from other districts in the overall governing body.

For example, a state legislator whose district includes Sea Girt should base his or her advocacy work on the views of coastal residents. For that representative not to do so, decisions in the legislative body would reflect the needs of other parts of the state, such as urban or agricultural areas, possibly to the detriment of this oceanfront community. Therefore it is important that the representative understand and reflect the will of the people they serve.

The second question deals with ensuring that a governing body reflects the people it serves. In other words, the representatives should reflect the cultural, economic and social makeup of the communities he/she is representing. In New Jersey, this means taking into account the significant diversity that exists within the state. Opponents of this notion will argue that affirmative action is not justified. That is not what I’m advocating for here. Again, take the example of the beachfront community. If the representative is not a beach resident, how can he/she truly know and understand the needs of the community? So should be the case, for example, in areas where there is a large Latino population; there should be representation, at least in part, by individuals who are Latino — who know, understand and participate in the community.

Now, there are many elected representatives that will say “trust me.” However based on the previous information I suggest we turn that question around and say: “We will trust ourselves to hold you accountable.” The architects of the constitution based their work on limiting the power of government and making it of the people, for the people, and by the people. As such, in this type of political structure it is OUR responsibility to ensure that the answers to both of the question above are yes. We cannot, as responsible citizens, relinquish our responsibility to continually demand that our needs based on the cultural, economic and social makeup of our population be properly represented in the governing body.

We should keep this in mind each and every time we step into a voting booth, as well as every time there is a position open where the occupant is responsible for representing a diverse population — from school board member to president, including state legislator. The decisions we make in that booth will not only affect us as individuals but also our community and families as well, and not just now, but for generations to come.

Therefore let us always take responsibility for holding each of our representatives accountable. We are the authors of our future, either through action or inaction. Your community is counting on you.

Y acuerdense — Su voto es su voz. ¡Voten este 4 de Noviembre!

Siempre Adelante!

I returned from my week-long trip to San Diego, CA where I attended the National Council of La Raza (NCLR) Annual Convention. The highlight of the conference was the participation of the presumptive Democratic and Republican nominees, Barack Obama and John McCain, respectively. I was privileged to have front row seats for both speeches and a perfect view of the audience and their reactions to the speeches. The speeches were well covered by the media so I thought I would provide a different angle to their participation.

This was the third major Latino event where both candidates made appearances. In June, both Obama and McCain addressed the National Association of Latino Elected & Appointed Officials (NALEO) Convention (which I also attended) in Washington, DC. In early July, both addressed the League of United Latin American Citizens (LULAC) convention, which was also in Washington, DC. The NCLR Conference is the biggest Latino advocacy conference in the United States as it draws over 20,000 people per year to the conference. This year’s NCLR conference probably set an attendance record.

Obama’s speech got many standing ovations at the NCLR Conference. He got one of the biggest applauses when he mentioned that the immigration enforcement system that separates children from adults was not working and needs to be changed. He reminded the audience that McCain no longer supported his own bill, the McCain-Kennedy Bill which would have given undocumented immigrants an opportunity to come out of the shadows and into the American light. He did a very good job with his speech and I thought that it was beyond brilliant in terms of how he put all of the issues together to sync with the common themes of NCLR’s mission. He also discussed other issues that were important to Latinos (i.e. education, health care, foreclosure crisis). In a sign of respect for pronunciation, Obama pronounced “La Raza” with the soft “rrr” and not the usually hard “RRR” that most English-speaking individuals pronounce the word. Any time you can say a Spanish word in the correct phonetic pronunciation, that will always win you points in the Latino community.

If you want to see my feedback to the local CBS affiliate in San Diego following the Obama speech, visit: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xkwPmqktCVg&NR=1.

It also includes a summary of everything that happened that day, including the clash between Obama supporters and anti-immigrant protesters outside the San Diego Convention Center.

McCain’s speech was well-prepared and he stayed on his point. He got a nice applause when he talked about the fact that some in the Republican party used the immigration debate to denigrate the hard work of Latinos in the United States and he condemned it. To his credit, McCain stayed after his prepared remarks to take questions from the audience . . . a gutsy move if I must say so myself, since most of the audience were fired up regarding the immigration debate. A very courageous moment happened during the Q&A session when an undocumented student took the microphone (risking her identity and admitting she was undocumented). She asked McCain to please think about the millions of undocumented students who did not come to the U.S. by choice. It was a risky move by the student to expose her immigration status in front of the cameras, but McCain answered that he would support immigration reform only AFTER the borders were secured. That didn’t win him a lot of friends in the audience since the timing of such an initiative was suspect. McCain countered the criticism regarding his border-security-first position, saying he is a straight talker and that a comprehensive bill could only be achieved after the borders were secured; otherwise it would not pass Congress in his opinion.

Overall, I think the audience gave McCain positive points for just showing up to the NCLR Conference and staying to take questions from the audience knowing that he was going to get tough immigration questions. Bear in mind that the audience was already expecting a more hardline message from McCain so the audience may have felt better with McCain’s speech because he spoke very sincerely even if his views didn’t sync with that of the audience. Many of the conference-goers remember the speech that Karl Rove gave to NCLR two years earlier in Los Angeles where Rove was severely booed because of his hardline approach to immigration and read from a prepared speech that seemed to forget who his audience was . . . Latinos who care about immigration. Compared to Karl Rove’s speech, John McCain’s speech was a relief to the NCLR audience. I heard from women at the conference that having Cindy McCain there won him some points with Latinas. He also won points when he insisted that the Q&A session go longer than the original schedule and was willing to stay as long as he was allowed to in order to answer questions from the audience of thousands. When McCain was finished with the Q&A session, he received his only standing ovation (a common courtesy that the conference attendees gave to every speaker at the conference). Of all the three major Latino events (NALEO, LULAC, NCLR), McCain probably gave his most effective public speech at NCLR.

I would have to say that since Obama got at least three standing ovations at the NCLR Conference (vs. one for McCain, when he concluded his Q&A session), I think that Obama did a better job connecting with the community. However if you handicap the fact that the crowd was looking for an inspirational speech by Obama and a hardline speech by McCain, one could argue that it was a wash for both of them because they got an inspirational speech by Obama as expected but didn’t get a Karl Rove-like speech from McCain, which may have exceeded some people’s expectations.

Neither McCain nor Obama have a lock on the Latino vote. Because of that, both will have to work hard to address the concerns of the communities. The next opportunities to address a national Latino audience will likely be the U.S. Hispanic Chamber of Commerce (USHCC) Convention in Sacramento, California this September. I expect that both candidates will be invited to address this all-business segment of the Latino community but we will not know if they will be addressing the USHCC Convention until late August or early September.

It’s rare that the Chairman & CEO of JP Morgan Chase Jaime Dimon gives a public speech, but on Tuesday (July 8), he addressed the FDIC Mortgage Conference in Washington, DC. His topic was broad-based with the state of the financial markets and his overall economy as the focal points of his comments. The list of speakers at the conference was a who’s who, including Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke.

During his speech, Dimon expressed his concern about the tone in which some conservative members of Congress are addressing the immigration debate. In his speech, Dimon said, “Let’s not kill the golden goose.” He then went on to say, “I listen to some of our politicians speak, and I think they’re going to send ME back.” It was the only time he got some laughter and long applause in appreciation that some conservative members of Congress have gone too far with the immigration/deportation debate.

Dimon then added “we have to build a economy that is vibrant and healthy and some policies can destroy that . . . don’t destroy the beauty of this economy that could produce so much,” which was a message directed to those anti-immigrant members of Congress that immigrants are a source of growth for the U.S. economy.

His comments were very welcoming in my opinion as JP Morgan Chase recognizes the importance of immigration in the United States. His comments sparked a debate on CNBC, which is the official television network of Wall Street. Shortly after Dimon concluded his remarks, there was a short but clearly heated debate between CNBC contributor Charlie Gasparino and CNBC Anchor Michelle Caruso-Cabrera. Gasparino thought that it was not a good speech by Dimon and added that he thought Dimon made a “crazy comment about immigration.” Caruso-Cabrera, feeling that Gasparino was injecting his own conservative views on immigration, cut him off to clarify and defend Dimon. It sparked an argument between Gasparino and Caruso-Cabrera. This is yet another example as to why it’s important that we have diversity in the broadcast media. Thankfully Caruso-Cabrera (who is Latina and was once named by Hispanic Magazine as one of the 100 Most Influential Hispanics” in the nation) set the record straight before a live national audience that Dimon’s stance on immigration is a positive one.

Even on Wall Street, the issue of immigration is a hot topic. I for one am thankful that the Chairman & CEO of the third largest banking institution in the United States understands the importance of immigration and it makes me feel proud to be a JP Morgan Chase customer. As a Wall Street financial analyst, it also gives me pleasure to see that we have anchors on CNBC such as Caruso-Cabrera who understand the positive of the immigration debate and will not allow contributors to inject their own politics into an objective economic debate.

To see some of the videos clips, visit http://www.cnbc.com/ and search “Dimon” and you will see some of the clips that I reference in this blog. Bravo to JP Morgan Chase President & CEO Jaime Dimon and bravo to CNBC Anchor Michelle Caruso-Cabrera.

One, “Oh hell no, you didn’t come to El Salvador and not drink at least one beer with your cousins. For that you might as well have stayed in the U.S., Yankee!”, seventy-five mosquito bites, more than a hundred jokes of which I was the punchline, one allergic reaction to a pupusa with pork, one incredible drunken night, one horrible hangover, one, “Did you kill yourself?” from Grandma, with a, “I think so” response from me. One, “Where the hell am I? Oh, I’m in El Salvador.” Two shrimp and oyster cocktails, two fried fish with rice and salad, two trips to the beach “Conchalio, Mirpon” and mini soccer game with Godfather. Twenty, “Damn you didn’t grow a bit, mijo!” from tias, tios and cousins. One family gathering that turned into two. One, “C’mon just stick your fingers down your throat and all this will be over!” One fainting incident. One, “I remember why I use to drink” moment, followed by, “I remember now, why I don’t drink!” moment. Twelve “refills” from my cousin, and dancer, to a resounding, “Yes” from me, “RE-Fill, RE-Fill, RE-Fill.” One, “Grandma used to kick my ass all the time, I don’t know what you are talking about” to a “You were the special one, no one ever touched you!” One, “I never spanked you” to “Oh yeah, I did, when you didn’t want to eat and use to jump the fence to go play futbol.” One, “I told you so.” One, “Damn grandma was a looker when she was young,” to an uncle’s response, “Yeah why do you think there were 13 of us?” To a cousin’s response, “No television.”

One, “A secret between two is of God, between three is of Satan,” while Grandma stared at me while I was in the room (insinuating I was Satan!). One, “Holy crap, are we in Hell?” Uncle, “We might be. Check if your grandma’s here!” One, “Mira hijo de P%&a, I’m not too old to pull your ears!” One, “So, you went to Mirpon and they said it was a good business day. Who drank all those beers?” With no choice but to tell the truth, my aunt, my two cousins, and myself, said, “Grandma drank all those beers tio; see, she was so lit, she was dancing Reggaeton!” (True story by the way, not that she drank all the beers, but that she was dancing Reggaeton).

One, “I was so hungry, because I didn’t eat on the plane, in the hopes that when I landed they would take me to Pollo Campero (El Salvador’s national fast food chain of chicken), but instead, they took me to Pizza Hut!” Uncle, “You were so set on Pollo Campero, that when they asked you if you wanted anything to eat, you said, ‘pio’.” One, “I have to let him win (my uncle in the game of soccer), but I don’t think he needs help, he can move for an old out of shape, beer gut guy.” One, “I heard that, and I would appreciate it if you didn’t call me old.” One, “Hey the lady with the bill is looking for you”; one, “How did she know I’m the one who’s going to pay?” Thirteen family members turn and look at grandma, “She told her.” Two unexpected farts from the old lady, which left me surprised. One room-clearing fart, which left my cousins saying, “Ese polvo esta fuerte!” One, (to my first cousin) “I can’t believe you had three years to find me a girlfriend and you failed.” One, (after hearing what I had to say, my young 12-year-old, second cousin went on her own to immediately find me a girlfriend) “Here tio, te presento a mi prima.” One, “I love you prima for being proactive.”

One, “I’m sorry to disappoint you, but this is not the first time I’ve had a shotgun pointed at me.” One, “Don’t worry it’s not loaded, but it’s not meant for you, it’s for him.” One, “Huh? Well shotguns splatter, point it that way!” One, “Please don’t take pictures in here.” One, “I didn’t know, so can I take the bunny ears off then?”

One, “Wow, the women are so beautiful.” One, “Hey, I know I look good but why is everyone staring at me?” One, “They know you’re from El Norte, but they can’t figure out if you got deported or you’re here visiting.” One, “Hey do you mind if we go to the beach, pick up this lady, drive back, and then go eat?” One, “Do I have a choice?” “No.” “Then I guess I don’t mind.” One, “Hey I think the battery is dead.” One, “Ok, so what does that mean?” One, “Means we can’t go anywhere.” One, “Hell NO! I’ll buy you it and we’re good for the rest of the trip!” One, “Holy crap, I think I passed the Ruins of Tazumal.” Me, “How do you know?” Primo, “’Cause we’re five kilometers from Guatemala.” One, “We drove for two hours, almost ended up in Guatemala, and this S&*T is closed!????” Primo, cool, calm, and collected, “It does appear that way, oh well, what you going to do? Well, at least take a picture now that you’re here.”

One too many stories of the civil war and how my cousin was forced to kill himself because he had escaped an ambush by the guerillas; uncle was assassinated (by the military death squad). One story on how the FMLN targeted my other uncle. One story of how my aunt had to flee the country because the Military Death Squad was going to kill her and my cousins. Two stories on how my uncle became involved in the guerrilla movement. One story on how one of my uncles couldn’t leave the Police Station where he was, while the combat was two blocks from his house. One, “I can’t believe this, I never saw my two uncles together during the war.” One, “I don’t think I ever did either.” Two, “The good times we missed due to our country’s war.” One, “Holy crap, we were there!?” One, “Yeah, and you were chanting: ‘El pueblo unido, jamas sera vencido.’ ” One, “I can see me saying that!” Two, “And you were only four.”

Airplane ticket, $753 plus tax; three nights clubbing, $300; two nights of family outings, $230; 30 pupusas in the total trip, about $10; 5 coconuts, $2.50; one long trip to Guatemala to ruins that were closed, $45; one incredible drinking binge for a day, $120; one car battery, $74; five Pollo Campero visits, $40; four bus rides, $2; two $24 cleats; one $10 watch; $60 worth of miscellaneous stuff for friends and family; countless war stories from both sides of the family and family-related stories; one ecstatic aunt; and one Reggaeton dancing old lady of 88 years of age that I like to call Grandma: “PRICELESS.”

I sat next to a woman in the nail salon today and was talking to her about the fact that they had the ESPN channel on TV. We were both laughing when I said, “This isn’t a sports bar, it’s a nail salon!” When we asked the staff why and if we could have the channel changed we were told they were not allowed. The conversation quickly turned to culture — how the Asian culture traditionally respects authority so much so that even if a customer requested a change they would not disobey their boss; whereas, in the US, customer service is the driving force. I even mentioned that culturally, looking into someone’s eyes is a sign of disrespect for many Asians. It was a good conversation about cultural differences. Or so I thought.

What a surprise when this kind, grandmotherly woman quickly turned the conversation to immigrants and the fact that immigrants come to this country and don’t want to speak English and expect to serve “us” but cannot communicate with “us.” I’m looking at this woman like, “Are you kidding me? Are you really attempting to have this conversation with me? Do you not recognize that I am from immigrant stock? Is it not obvious to you that I may have a different opinion on this matter?”

As my eyes bulged out of my head and as I try to suppress a smile of disbelief (I tend to smile when I’m in a situation I think is crazy like, this is a joke, right?, this can’t be happening, right?) So here I am trying to teach this old lady (no offense) the facts — that statistically most immigrants lose the ability to speak their language by the 3rd generation. That is, over time immigrants assimilate into the culture. I shared my example: my parents speak Spanish but know enough English to get by. I speak both English and Spanish although I think in English only. My daughter speaks English with a sprinkle of Spanish, the exact opposite of my parents. In fact, I told her, I’m sending my daughter to a Spanish-language immersion program for the summer. My point was, basically, don’t worry — eventually immigrants get there naturally.

But even the facts were not enough to deter her.

Then it was like a light bulb turned on for me. I finally got why people are so anti-immigrant — NOT anti-undocumented immigrants but immigrants as a whole. It was as clear to me as “day” as they say. Seriously, I never even considered this reason. Never even thought about it.

Why? Why all this animosity? Why no empathy for people who come to this country just like their own families did — most with nothing, just like their own families, to struggle and find a better way of life? Why would or could you not relate to this experience? It’s so interesting to me and quite profound when I finally got it at the nail salon talking to the modern day version of Aunt Bee.

They’re jealous. And arrogant. This may sound simplistic but frankly many things in life are simple; we just tend to make it complicated. Why jealous? Because I bet they wish they didn’t have to assimilate so much. I bet they wish they didn’t have to give up their language, heritage. I bet they wish they could have communicated with their grandparents more. They couldn’t because mom and dad would not speak to them in their language. I bet they wish they could have visited their home country more. It’s the attitude of “We had it hard, we had to do it, we had to suffer, why can’t these new immigrants have it just as hard as we did? Why should we make it EASY for them by accepting their language? By creating services for their language specifically? We didn’t have that, no one made it easy for me, why should we make it easy for them?”

It’s childish. It’s jealousy. It’s a tantrum. Essentially, America is going through a collective good old-fashioned temper tantrum. Just like a 2-year-old that’s jealous when mom gives brother a bigger piece of cake. “It’s not fair!”

As a mom — here’s the mom segment for those eagerly waiting; ok so only Donald — I teach my daughter about sharing, about leaving a place better than you found it, about helping others when you can and to make sure she takes care of herself first. If we can do better, be more helpful, provide more resources then why wouldn’t we? Why would we deliberately hold back and WANT others to suffer? Just because we did? Frankly, adults are allowed to get away with things we would NEVER allow our kids to get away with. We are allowed a temper tantrum and call it public policy, a debate, an issue.

Ok, so why arrogant? Well it’s the idea that just because we did it that way it’s the right way, the only way. There are no other options or the other options are wrong. That’s a flawed argument. Because the collective country agreed to assimilate in this way is that what everyone else should do? If people keep thinking this way they are gonna live frustrated lives. We don’t even watch TV or get the news the same way we did in the ’80s, much less in the ’40s, ’50s and ’60s. Times, they are a changin’ and you better change with it or some Gen Xer is gonna write about you in her blog.

So my nails were dry and we left on a positive note or at least I did, smiling and friendly as I always am. “Nice talking to you,” I said and wished her well. Walked out, my head held high. I’m sure that’s not a conversation or the person she was looking for.

In California, there is a case that in my opinion demonstrates the cold, insensitive, and the downright negligence of our immigration courts as well as the U.S. Immigration & Customs Enforcement (ICE). The story is about a Fresno, CA high school student named Arthur Mkoyan (pronounced MI-KO-YAN) who came to the U.S. at the age of two. His parents came to the U.S. from Armenia because their father blew the whistle on a corruption case in the country and feared for their lives. In fact, in 1992 after Arthur’s father notified the Armenian authorities about drivers license corruption in Armenia, their house was set on fire, which in my opinion was an attempt on their family’s lives. To protect his family and child, they fled Armenia to the U.S.

Despite the well-documented risk to their lives in Armenia, immigration officials have begun deportation proceedings on the whole family, including the child who is now a senior honors student at Bullard High School in Fresno. ICE decided that since Arthur Mkoyan is graduating VALDICTORIAN from Bullard High School, they would allow Arthur Mkoyan to graduate with his class, get his valedictorian award (and all of the prestige that comes with it), give him 10 days to pack his things, and then deport him with his parents to Armenia, where his valedictorian status would be meaningless because he doesn’t speak Armenian and knows nothing about Armenian life. After all, Arthur Mkoyan is an American child at heart. He did everything right and is graduating at the top of his class. And to show how much the U.S. government values his academic achievement and value, he’s being deported by ICE.

And to think that former U.S. Senate candidate and Mayor of Morristown, NJ Don Cresitello actually wanted to deputize his Morristown police officers under the supervision of ICE to help in these kinds of cases at the local level? So glad he was blown out on Tuesday’s Primary Election Day.

The Arthur Mkoyan is yet another example of just how unbelievably senseless the government is with the deportation of students. This is also an example that the immigration issue is not just a Latino challenge. Arthur Mkoyan could possibly be a marked man if he returns to Armenia because he is the son of a whistleblower who exposed corruption in the distribution of drivers’ licenses in the country and it almost cost them their lives. There are thousands of Latino students who are deported to countries that are foreign to them because they were too young to remember their country of origin and are ill prepared for life in those countries.

These students are true Americans by heart. But the government doesn’t want these kinds of talented students in America, and thus you have cases like Arthur Mkoyan. It goes to show you the extremities that the anti-immigrant forces will go to promote their causes. This case as well as the many thousands of similar student cases could have all been resolved if Congress had passed the Development, Relief, and Education for Alien Minors Act (DREAM Act) last fall. However, it fell four votes short in the U.S. of the 60 votes needed to have a filibuster-proof vote.

My message to the federal government is simple: USE SOME COMMON SENSE. Many of these kids with immigration challenges have the potential not only to fill hard-to-fill jobs, but they may also succeed high enough to even create American businesses that may hire the very people who are complaining that Americans are losing jobs to immigrants.

Wouldn’t that be ironic??? Students whose immigration problems are fixed and later graduate college to start business that in turn hire AMERICANS!!!! It would be a whole lot better than the current corporate culture of sending jobs overseas backed by U.S. tax incentives pushed by the Bush Administration.

Either the Bush Administration (and those Senators who voted “NAY” on the DREAM ACT) are too naïve, or I’m just too smart of a blogger to see that this deportation case raises serious questions about the care and prioritization of our children in America regardless of their immigration status. I stand by my Armenian friends as I do with my Latino, Asian, Caribbean, African, and European friends that have similar student immigration problems. WE MUST PASS THE DREAM ACT NOW and stop this nonsense!!!

To see the CNN story about Arthur Mkoyan, click here: http://www.cnn.com/2008/US/06/05/armenian.valedictorian/index.html